求几篇英语哲理小故事，带翻译，课前三分钟要用，急啊！

(1)与对手共事要小心。狮子邀请狐狸到山里打猎，答应把捕到的猎物给它一半，狐狸就去了。 到了山里，狮子堵住了唯一的一条退路，把狐狸吃了。

(2)被贪害死。一个黑人在沙漠里没水喝已三天了，就在他将死时，他向上帝许了三个愿望。第一个是，下辈子能天天有水喝，第二个是，下辈子能成高贵的人，第三个是，下辈子能天天看女人的屁屁。上帝答应了他，后耒他就变成一只马桶了！

(3)真正的领导。一个人去买鹦鹉，第一只鹦鹉会说两种语言，售价二百元。第二只鹦鹉会说四种语言，售价四百元。这两只都年轻又美丽。第三只鹦鹉年纪老了，颜色暗暗，羽毛散乱，标价八百元。这人问店主，这只鹦鹉会说八种语言吗？店主说：不。这人问：那为什么卖高价钱呢？店主回答：因为那两只叫这只老板呀。

哪位给推荐一篇大学英语小故事三分钟到五分钟幽默类或哲理类的

The crow and the foxOne day a big black crow,found some cheese."I will fly up into tree with it."she said." I want to eat it now."A foxcame by and saw the bird.He saw the cheese as well.He wanted to eat the cheese,too.He went round and round the tree while he thought howha could get the cheese.Then he said to the crow,"You look very nice.If you can sing very nicely as well,I think you must be Queen of all the birds."The crow was very pleased.She liked to be called a Queen."Yes,I can sing."She said.But as she said this the cheese fell from her beak.Down to the ground it fell.The fox picked up the cheese and ran away."You may be Queen of the birds.You may look nice and you may sing well.But you do not think very well."he said,as he ran off.

三分钟英语幽默小故事

He Won

Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.

Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?

Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

他赢了

汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？

约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。

汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？

约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。

I Have His Ear in My Pocket

Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"

"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.

"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.

"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."

他的耳朵在我衣兜里

伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”

“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。

“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。

“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”

A Good Boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”

“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”

“她是个卖糖果的。”

Drunk

One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."

"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"

醉酒

一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！”

Hospitality

The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor **iled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.

好客

由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪？” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。

英语小笑话

上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you

know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著

性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的

一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是

A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟

能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了.

A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second"

一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"且话偻蚰昴?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."

1,Two birls

Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell us.

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

两只鸟

老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？

学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

老师：请说说看。

学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。

2. The Fish Net

"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?"

"A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.

鱼网

"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安？" 老师发问道。

"把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。" 小女孩回答道。

3. The New Teacher

George comes from school on the first of September.

"George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.

"I didn\'t like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too....."

新老师

9月1日， 乔治放学回到家里。

"乔治，你喜欢你们的新老师吗？" 妈妈问。

"妈妈，我不喜欢，因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。"

4. A physics Examination

Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his clas**ates were thinking it hard.

The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls?

Nick\'s answer: Because our eyes are before ears.

一次物理考试

在一次物理考试时，当同学们都还在苦思冥想时，尼克很快就答好了第一个问题。

这个问题是：为什么在打雷时，我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声？

尼克的回答是：因为眼睛在前，耳朵在后。

Jim’s History Examination

Uncle: How did Jim do in his history examination?

Mother: Oh, not at all well, but there, it wasn't his fault. They asked him

things that happened before the poor boy was born.

吉姆的历史考试

舅舅：吉姆这孩子历史考得怎么样？

母亲：唉，糟透了。可话又说回来，这也不能怪他。嗨，他们尽问一些这个

可怜的孩子出生前的事儿。

Magic change

神奇变化

Gaga is a little duck. He is **all, dirty and ugly. His friends don’t like to play with him.

One day, Gaga walked behind his friends quietly(静悄悄地).But his friends did not want him. Gaga was very sad and ran to the river and cried loudly(大声地)。

Just then, a big beautiful bird heard(听见)him crying and flew down(飞下来，落下来). She said, “Please don’t cry. Tell me, what do you want? I can help you.”

Gaga told the truth(真相). The beautiful bird said, “OK, I can help you to become a good-looking duck.” Then she took out a blanket and put it on the duck’s body. She said something which the little duck didn’t understand. Then she took away the blanket. There stood (站立)a good-looking duck.

Gaga was very happy. He thanked the big bird and quickly went to play with his friends

优秀英语小故事3分钟

现在的家长为了培养孩子的英语学习能力，每天都会给孩子看一些外国的动画片，去请外教学习，有时候家长也可以学习一些简单的英语小短文，每天孩子睡觉前也可以给他们讲英语的小故事，但是时间也不要太长，用英语故事和汉语故事结合，这样既能锻炼孩子的英语能力，也能增强孩子的表达能力，下面是我整理的英语小故事，希望会对您有所帮助！

优秀英语小故事3分钟（一）

The Old Cat

An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old. One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.

Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years, and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old, but remember what good work the old did when they were young."

老猫

一位老妇有只猫，这只猫很老，它跑不快了，也咬不了东西，因为它年纪太大了。一天，老猫发现一只老鼠，它跳过去抓这只老鼠，然而，它咬不住这只老鼠。因此，老鼠从它的嘴边溜掉了，因为老猫咬不了它。

于是，老妇很生气，因为老猫没有把老鼠咬死。她开始打这只猫，猫说：“不要打你的老仆人，我已经为你服务了很多年，而且还愿意为你效劳，但是，我实在太老了，对年纪大的不要这么无情，要记住老年人在年青时所做过的有益的事情。”

优秀英语小故事3分钟（二）

Two dogs

A man has two dogs: a hound and a housedog. He trains the hound to help him hurt and teaches the housedog to watch the house. When he returns home after a day’s hunt, he always gives the house-dog some meat. The hound feels very angry. He says unhappily to the housedog, “Where I work very hard outside, you share my food.” “Don’t blame me, my friend. You should blame the master. He doesn’t teach me to hurt, but to share other’s food,” the housedog answers. Don’t blame children for the mistakes of their parent

两只狗

有一个人养了两条狗：一条是猎犬，一条是看家狗。他训练猎狗帮他打猎，教看家狗守家。当猎人打了一天猎回家后，总要分给看家狗一些肉，猎狗对此很生气。它不高兴地对看家狗说道：“我在外边追捕猎物十分辛苦，而你在家什么都不做，但你却分享我的食物。”看家狗回答道：“不要责怪我，我的朋友。你应该去责备主人。他不教我打猎，却只教我分享别人的食物。” 不要因为父母的错误而去责备孩子。

优秀英语小故事3分钟（三）

Three Good Friends

One day, a monkey rides his bike near the river. This time he sees a lion under a tree. The lion runs at him. He is afraid and falls into the river. He can’t swim. He shouts. The rabbit hears him. He jumps into the river. The rabbit swims to the monkey, but he can’t help him. Luckily, an elephant comes along. He is very strong. He helps the rabbit and monkey. Three friends are very happy. They go to the elephant’s home. Then, three of them become good friends.

三个好朋友

一天，一只猴子在河边骑车。这时他看见树下有一只狮子，狮子向他跑来。他非常的害怕，掉进河里。他不会游泳，大叫起来。兔子听见了，跳进水里，但他却没有办法救猴子。幸运的是，一只大象过来了。大象非常强壮，救出了兔子和猴子。他们来到大象的家，在那里吃了一顿大餐。从此他们成了好朋友。

幽默的英语小故事

英语 故事 是英语教材中提升学生学习兴趣、展现学习要点的重要载体,是英语教学无法绕过的槛。我整理了幽默的英语小故事 ，欢迎阅读!

幽默的英语小故事篇一

名声与艰苦劳动

During the Gulf War，my sister，Jane，bought a flag and asked her apartment's maintenance man, a Vietnam vet，to install a pole for him. When she offered to pay him,he told her there was no way he could take money for putting up the American flag.

海湾战争期间，我妹妹珍妮买了一面美国国旗，她请房子的维修工—一位老兵给她竖一根旗杆。当我妹妹为此什给他钱时，他说，他帮助挂美国国旗，无论如何都不该收钱。

Jane contacted her local newspaper，and they published an article about the incident. The next time she encountered the maintenance man, he told her that everyone he knew had read her story and that she had made him a celebrity.Jane jokingly asked for his autograph.

珍妮来到当地报杜，就此事在报上发表了一篇 文章 。当珍妮第二次碰到那位维修工时，他对珍妮说他所认识的人都看了她写的报章，是她使他成为了名人。珍妮开玩笑地说让他给签个名。

"I don't have time,"the man replied. "I'm too busy setting up American flags.”

他回答说:“那我可没时间，挂美国国旗的事忙得我不可开交。”

幽默的英语小故事篇二

独自在家

My wife will go to any extreme to keep people from,knowing she is home alone. One evening when I was working late，my wife heard a knock on the door. She ignosed it,but the knocing continued. Frantic，sloe began to bark,softly at first，then louder and louder. Much to her relief,the knocking soon stopped.

我妻子独自在家时，总是不想让别人知道家里没有其他的人。一天晚上，我工作到很晚。我妻子听到有人敲门，她就没理，但敲门的声音总是不停，慌乱之中，她开始学狗叫。一开始她低声地叫，随后她的叫声越来越大。敲门声很快地停了，她这才松了口气。

The next day the paper boy came to the door to collect."I came by last night,"he told me,"but I left when your wife barked at me!"

第二天，送报的小孩来我家收钱，那小孩告诉我:“我昨晚上就来了，你老婆老冲我学狗叫，我就走了。”

幽默的英语小故事篇三

彼得的长相决定了分数

One semester when my brother, Peter，attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis，an art-student friend of his asked if he could paint Peter's portait for a class.assignment. Peter agreed，and the art student painted and submitted the portrait, only to receive a C minus.

我兄弟彼得在明尼阿波利斯的明尼索达大学上学时，有一个学期，他的一位学艺术的朋友问他是否可以用他做 素描 的模特作为课堂作业。彼得同意了。那位艺术生画完了，就把肖像交给了老师。他只得了一个C-.

The art student approached the professor to ask why the grade was so poor. The teacher told him that the proportions in the painting were incorrect.”The head is too big，”the professor explained.”The shoulders are too wide， and the feet are enormous."

那位艺术生找到教授问为什么他的分数这么低。教授告诉他肖像中的比例失调，教授说:“脑袋太大，肩太宽，脚也过于大了。”

The next day,the art student brought Peter to see the professor. He took one Look at my brother."Okay, A minus. "he said.

第二天，那位艺术生带彼得见教授，教授看了我兄弟一眼，并说:“好，可以得A-。”

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